Saturday, August 6, 2016

The "I have 'Two' Brains?" Theory

I had a conversation with a fellow blogger the other day and we discussed the intricate workings of the human brains. Yes, I said brains because anatomically we have a single medulla oblongata (brain for those layman types) yet metaphorically we have a second brain that tends to create conflicting situations and bad choices. Ponder that thought for a moment and see if you can figure out what I am talking about. Still have no clue? This brain is strategically located somewhere between your head and your feet and when neglected tends to lead to poor decision making, well for some. Yes, I am referring to that organ that has the ability to create both pleasure and pain.

You are probably asking yourself why would you not just call it what it is? It has so many names and slang words that our younger generation may not understand what I am referring to since it doesn't have its own app and they are less likely to read something unless it shows up on a YouTube video. I can't forget hashtags either because how would anyone expect to find something if it doesn't have a hashtag associated with it (#readabook)? For those who do understand what I am talking about let's move onward.

Since the dawn of Adam and Eve procreation is more than just two people engaging in coitus (yes I went there). It has turned into a world that tests and challenges the boundaries of a person's sexual orientation, preference, and sense of adventure. Sex is not just about procreation anymore and has turned into an industry for some, hobby for others and a coping mechanism for the weak. This is the reason why our own sexual organ has become classified as having its own brain.

How many times have you told yourself that you will not have sex with someone yet that second brain volunteers its own opinion and overwrites the mental thought process that goes into making choices? I have fallen victim to this conundrum and I can say with confidence that 99% of all human beings, minus the human-like aliens with their probes, have also fallen victim. This second brain has the competency and effectiveness to overwrite the frontal lobe despite having not one single anatomical characteristic that resembles a human brain. Why is that? It's because sex has turned into a drug, one that creates addictive like symptoms, that when neglected creates the want and need for attention.

Throughout the years I have seen this second brain create a world of problems for most but in some instances it has created positive outcomes. A man and a woman break up due to personality indifferences or as a result of promiscuous behavior. Yet this does not stop them from engaging in sexual acts for the purpose of gratification. Why would you allow yourself, emotionally and physically, to engage in sexual acts with a person who you cannot see a future with? The simplest explanation is because the second brain has overridden the ethical thought process of the real brain thereby creating the sense that using a person for sexual gratification is acceptable, at least for that moment. It is amazing how powerful this second brain has become yet the one word you could associate with this type of behavior is regret because you do it for the wrong reasons.

Some may agree with my interpretation and I am sure many will disagree but the fact remains that we use that second brain all to often and for the wrong reasons. People break up for a number of reasons and if you are working to rekindle that love than go for it. If you choose to engage sexually with someone you are not in a relationship with, knowingly, than you must live with the emotions that come with that choice. Remember that your choices can effect others but it can also effect you indirectly in a way that you may not see as you use certain mechanisms to block those emotions out. As an adult you have choices and you alone have the responsibility to evaluate those choices before taking any type of action. Just ask yourself which brain is making the choice for me before you act.

Wednesday, June 15, 2016

To Fear or not to Fear Theory

The reason I began Craigisms was because I had created quotes that people remembered because it opened their minds or it was catchy. One quote that has stuck in my mind throughout the years was Franklin D Roosevelt's inaugural speech in 1933 where he said "So, first of all, let me assert my firm belief that the only thing we have to fear is fear itself—nameless, unreasoning, unjustified terror which paralyzes needed efforts to convert retreat into advance." I remember it like I was there when it occurred. Unfortunately, in today's world we found ourselves fearing more than just fear and senseless acts of terror make it that much more difficult not to fear our own lives day after day.

Most of you know, by the non-stop news coverage, about the senseless attack that occurred at a night club in Orland, FL. Many will speculate, conspiracy theorist will add their opinions and numerous investigations by law enforcement agencies will uncover information that will create sensory overload. Domestic terrorism is just as real as terrorism that occurs overseas. We may be a country internationally recognized as having the strongest military power but we do not have unlimited resources to cover every inch of the world or the United States. This doesn't stop people from voicing their concerns that America needs to change, or the purchase of firearms by citizens needs to be more restrictive, or foreign citizens should be more closely monitored.

It's the people who keep to themselves that all of a sudden have a solution to solving these types of problems. Better yet we all have some solution in mind but our voice is only heard through social media and rarely through the elected officials we vote into public office. Our voice is translated into a digital footprint that is spread amongst a series of friends and in some cases amongst the many with the use of hashtags. Here is the true question, "Are our words on social media actually heard by those who have the power to create or initiate change?" I certainly don't have time to read every single post from my Facebook newsfeed so how can I expect my elected officials to do the same?

Regardless if our concerns or resolutions make it to the right people it doesn't eliminate the fear that we all have about becoming the next victim of a terror attack or from someone who has a total disregard for human life. The one mistake we make though is identifying an attack on the masses as being a terror attack. We used to identify terrorist attacks as ones that are planned out and carefully calculated by a known terrorist organization such as the attacks that occurred on 9/11 by Al Qaeda.
Today any incident involving multiple casualties where the perpetrator is identified as having some ideological fixation or affiliation with a known terrorist group is labeled as a terrorist. To me this is different as this person did not come to the United States with the only intention of carrying some sort of attack. This is a person who has been influenced through an ideological set of principles. Granted it's terrorists groups who encourage this type of behavior but this person was influenced over time whether through social media or even the news.

Now that I have gone on about my opinion on how this works, in so few words, lets return back to the fear aspects of these attacks. Every time an attack like this occurs on American soil it spreads fear amongst the impacted community but quickly spreads worldwide once it reaches social media and new outlets. Theories begin to discuss how this attack could lead to more attacks whether it be at a well-known amusement park, sporting event, convention center or any place that would house thousands of people at any given time. Should I not go to these places for fear of falling victim to the next attack? Absolutely not. I don't want to stop living my life because I fear the next terror attack. For all I know I could lose my life to a car accident or natural causes. The best advice I can give to people who live in fear because of terrorists is live your life the way you want because you never know when or how it will end.

FDR talks about fearing fear itself. This is very true because we allow ourselves to fear many things. Those fears translate into actions or reactions that alter everyday living. It changes the way we think about things and what in our life needs to change as a result of that fear. Because of this our life is filled with a constant need to change to adapt to the new mindset. We allow these fears to negatively affect us or in some cases create a more positive approach to life. Events like the one in Orlando, FL remind us that we should never take life for granted and that we need to ensure our loved ones know how much we care and love them. Is the last argument with someone worth dwelling over not knowing what will happen in the new few minutes, hours or days? Should I stop going to clubs because one was attacked by a selfless human being or should I not go because I am getting too old? I prefer to not go because I think I am getting too old for it.

We must remember that life is all about making choices and fearing something or someone is included in that. To fear someone only creates the sense of superiority for that person. The people who died in Flight 93 certainly did not die from fear because some of the passengers chose to fight back. They overcame their fears and did what was necessary to save the thousands that would have died if the aircraft hit its intended target. That is how we should live our life, free of or by minimizing the fear so we can be in control of our own lives. You will find yourself opening up and doing things you never thought you would ever do because you overcame the fear. If you got to this point in my blog you may have overcome that fear of boredom because I was able to keep you engaged. Life to the fullest and just remember those words from FDR, "...the only thing we have to fear is fear itself."

Thursday, April 14, 2016

The Reprogramming Your Brain Theory

Conspiracy theorists have long predicted the future of mankind would be taken over by the “Machine”. Some would argue the machine will come in the form of robots or artificial intelligence just to name a few. Those who believe our world will be taken over by an apocalyptic phenomenon of man versus machine may end up one step ahead of the rest of those who see it as a farce. Maybe those who believe in it are reliving scenes from the Terminator or have they programmed their own minds to believe in this?

The human brain has many similarities to a modern day computer. It stores information that can be recalled rather quickly for some but as it ages it takes a bit longer. It has the ability to be programmed with information that tells you how to do something. For example, a person who speaks Spanish can do so because they have programmed (trained) their brain to understand it. How we walk, talk, interact and respond to something is all based on how your brain was programmed. Have you ever screamed at the top of your lungs when you see a spider? Your brain was programmed to fear spiders at some point in your life. As a result you have reprogrammed responses to that fear which in this case was both a physical and verbal reaction.

Can you see how similar you are to a computer now? Computers are made of many components that all have a specific job in how it works. Without one or more of these components the computer is not able to function efficiently and in some cases at all. Our body contains numerous organs that if any fail it effects our ability to function and in some cases result in death. The body knows how to function because it’s programmed to. How can we apply that same concept to our brains?

We have the ability to program ourselves to react to any situation we face or how we accomplish something. If you can program yourself to think one way it’s quite possible you can reprogram yourself to think another way. How does a person who has eaten meat most of their life one day become a vegetarian? It’s a life style change precipitated by your attempt to reprogram your brain and body to make the necessary adjustments to the new lifestyle. We are all built differently at both a cellular and genetic level therefore some people require more time for the reprogramming to take full effect. This same concept applies to fear, negativity, smoking, driving, speech and an infinite number of things.

Since my focus, in writing, is on my Craigism philosophy let’s discuss how we can apply this reprogramming theory to our own lives when it comes to negativity. From the moment we are born we are programmed to a life style determined by our parents and our environment. We learn the difference between right and wrong. We learn what the difference is between left and right. We also learn how to interpret life from a positive and negative perspective. Marriage is thought to be a positive moment in a person’s life, but I am sure there is a small percentage who would challenge me on that. On the other hand divorce is looked at negatively for a number of reasons all of which vary depending on the couple and the situation. I personally put divorce in the positive category for a few reasons:

  1. One or both individuals determine it’s in their best interest to part ways to better themselves or their lives. We can’t fault someone for wanting a change that betters themselves or the other person. When two people can make that decision together it creates a less traumatic experience and places focus on each other’s happiness rather than their own. Not all relationships end in this manner but rather than point the finger we can create a sense of separation that doesn’t ruin what did work out great during the tenure of the relationship
  2. For some it’s a sense of moving forward or closure from a relationship that was damaging on many levels. This could be a man or woman who was in a mentally or physically abusive relationship. Some people become so damaged by the abuse that their brain reprograms itself to be accepting of the behavior because their mental approach changes as a result of the abuse. Moving forward and getting out of the relationship, under your own choice, is the first step in reprogramming yourself to realizing life doesn’t have to be that way and that moving forward is the positive direction to head in.
So how can we reprogram our brains? First you you retrieve the jumper cables from your vehicle and connect them to your car battery. For those who actually did that before reading on should slowly step away from their vehicle and consider professional help. On a more serious note, brain reprogramming is not something that occurs over night. It's a process of steps that take time and requires changes that you are not use to. To get over fear you might have to face that fear numerous times till you become more comfortable with it. I am by no means a Neurologist so I honestly can't say how to scientifically reprogram your brain but using baby steps you can begin the initial phase of identifying what it is you are trying to change. In some scenarios you already know what needs to happen you just have to develop the courage and determination to do it. Talk to friends and family as they may be able to help you through this.

Everyone will interpret what I discussed above differently and that is ok. I am by no means telling people how they should think or interpret situations. I am expressing my opinions in the hopes that it creates dialogue or helps you think outside the box so your focus is not limited to a specific interpretation.  If my philosophy was proven to be globally beneficial I would be writing in a book rather than a blog but we all cannot appeal to the masses in ways we hope. 

Take the next couple of minutes to think about changes you believe are necessary in your life and how you would go about accomplishing them. Don't try to reach for the stars immediately but allow yourself to become a little bit vulnerable otherwise you don't open yourself up to change. Take each step one at a time and in due time you might find the change occurring. Those who were addicted to drugs once had to reprogram themselves to resist temptation. If they can do it so can you.

Sunday, October 4, 2015

The Turning a Blind Eye Theory © 2015

It has been brought to my attention on many occasions that I care too much about people that I end up pushing them away because that person feels its not necessary or they believe things will never happen to them. Reality check people we can all become victims to many things including: terrorism, murder, burglary, identify theft, scams, bullying and the list will go on and on. Just because we are not celebrities or a public figure doesn't mean we are the ones people will never find or consider when contemplating their plot. We are all potential victims, BUT we can prevent ourselves from becoming a victim by practicing simple countermeasures.

How often do you find yourself "Liking", then "Sharing", that Walt Disney World free trip contest on Facebook because it tells you to and because it says Walt Disney World in the title it must be true. WRONG! The last one I saw was obviously a fake because how many Walt Disney World Facebook pages do you know have less than 10,000 likes, only posts a few photos and was recently created this week? These are obvious signs that a Facebook page is fake. Wait a minute, are you saying that there are people out there who create fake pages and would try to scam me out of my information? I am not sure how to tell you this without being straight forward with you but YES!

First thing first, most social media sights have implemented a "Verified" measure that identifies highly visible businesses and public figures with a Check mark on their page that identifies them as being legit. These big time business have to supply certain information in order to verify who they say they are. These businesses and public figures also have to abide by strict rules when it comes to posting contests because certain verbiage is required from a legal standpoint for it to be in compliance with FB standards. If you see a Facebook page that doesn't have the "Blue Check mark" next to their name, and they are known world-wide, they are more than likely fake especially if they are offering you money, prizes or some monetary objects for engaging on their page.

Have we become that blind to spam and scams that we are willing to share these pages with our friends possibly placing them in jeopardy of falling victim to these scam artists? We have no problem sharing a video, quotes from websites, funny pictures,  and many other useless stuff that does nothing more than entertain us, but do we take even 2 seconds to determine whether or not sharing it could cause harm to those you share it with?

Being in the military has its advantages because we train continuously on Cyber-terrorism and we see first hand sometimes, from the experts, some of the various things that happen that result in people's identities being stolen or even bank accounts drained. This is not a joke people but I would venture to say that 80% of people don't care because they feel they are invincible to cyber threats.  Those who think that are either belittling themselves thinking they are not worth going after or are just blind to the true understanding to the effects of cyber threats. Either way if you feel you are this type of person you are more likely to fall victim to a cyber attack than a celebrity.

My Commanding Officer just came back from a Cyber-terrorism conference and was educated on a recent incident that occurred at, of all places, an airport. How can someone steal data at any airport? You are probably thinking because they used the Wi-Fi or maybe a credit card at a suspect kiosk. Well you would be wrong. They walked up to one of those "Charging Stations" to charge their phone because their battery was running low. Some people plug directly into the walls using their own chargers but this person decided to use the supplied charging station for its convenience. Well little did they know that Malware was installed on a device within the charging station that when a person plugged their phone in the malware was uploaded to their phones without them knowing. How is this possible? I am glad you asked. Cables that transfer data and charge phones have 4 lines. Two for charging and two for data. Once he plugged into the charging station those data lines were used to upload the software. For someone reason when this person returned to work they plugged their phone into their workstation (This is a no-no at any military facility) and the second he did that the Malware was then uploaded into the military network mainframe. Needless to say the Cyber teams went right to work when all those alarms started going off.

So you see we all must educate ourselves in the numerous practices in countering against cyber-terrorism. There are many websites, from legitimate companies, as well as training seminars at most businesses where we can learn that numerous techniques used to scam us. Take the time to learn about these methods so you do not become a victim. Sign up for credit monitoring so if someone gets a hold of your information they can't open accounts in your name. It may seem like a lot of money to buy into these services but how much will it costs you to recover money from your bank accounts, credit cards and identify theft when someone becomes you and you now have to prove that you are who you say you are. Don't wait for something to happen because EVERYONE is vulnerable if you allow yourself to be.

Remember that you sharing something could be hurting your friends more than you are helping them. Think before you click!

Sunday, September 20, 2015

Abuse & The Split Personality Theory © 2015

This theory has become part of a series of theories that get into the various aspects of a relationship and the obstacles that some face when it comes to abuse both emotionally and physically. In my "When Enough is Enough Theory" I discussed how difficult it is for people to make a decision as to when the time is right to get out of a relationship that they feel is abusive or going nowhere. In my "I am not Good Enough Theory" I talk about the fall outs from mental and physical abusive relationships and how it effects a person's self confidence and esteem. This theory will place a greater emphasis on the abuser where the past two have focused on the victims.

At someone point in every one's lives they have experienced some form of abuse whether physically or emotionally. Abuse comes in many forms and does not necessarily have to be obvious to the regular person because those who have experienced abuse, in some manner, for a good part of their lives are unable to distinguish between abuse and the norm. When a person has gotten so used to the abuse it seems as if they have fallen into a psychological phenomenon called Stockholm Syndrome. Stockholm Syndrome is where hostages express empathy and sympathy and have positive feelings towards their captors, sometimes to the point of defending and identifying with their captors (Webster's Dictionary).  You may be asking yourself how would this phenomenon apply to me when I am not a hostage? The first thing I would say is don't take the definition at face value and look into the effects psychologically and how you can compare those symptoms to abusive relationships.

Many men and women who live within an abusive relationship endure significant psychological effects that most people would say they understand, but do they? When a person's self confidence has reached an all-time low because of emotional abuse they begin to feel that no one would ever want someone who is broken, therefore they are less likely to leave that relationship. They have this gleaming hope that there is still love from their abuser. By no means are you a hostage in a relationship but fear creates that "hostage like feeling" because choosing to move on could result in increased abuse. For whatever reason though a person who chooses to stay in an abusive relationship is doing so at their own risk and for whatever reasons. They ultimately has to live with those decisions.

One of the biggest challenges with being in an abusive relationship is for others to see what you are going through. Abusers typically put on a good show in front of others which portrays them as your typical good citizen but behind closed doors their psychological mindset is that of an abuser. How often do you find yourself being emotionally abused but yet those closest to you don't see that side of the abuser? It happens more than you think and it makes it difficult for others to see and understand what you are going through. When you lack the emotional support from those you love it creates that "Boy who cried wolf" mentality where convincing them that you are a victim becomes harder over time. Unfortunately some people need to witness the abuse before they believe others rather than take a person's word for it. This creates a see-saw effect where you want to believe someone but you also know that person well enough and their judgement is brought into question.

The abuser throughout all this puts on that smile and is friendly with everyone outside the relationship. They create this persona to hide the fact they are inherently abusive in nature. This could stem from being abused themselves but their ability to maintain this "split personality" is borderline sociopath as their empathy towards those they abuse is nonexistent. Those that have mastered both persona's are difficult to expose because they understand their victims psychological mindset and use that to their advantage. Those individuals who experience this type of abuser should get out immediately, no matter what that circumstances are, otherwise you are making the choice to stay and unfortunately going to suffer further abuse at this person's hand.

That last statement might seem cold and many would argue that there are circumstances that I would not understand that prevent them from moving on but I would continue to say that leaving or staying is a choice. The only person who can make that choice is you. To say that you have no say in the matter is completely false, unless you find yourself in some legal battle where your right to make a choice, in some matter, is removed or revoked. When a person stays with another, even after hearing they cheated on them, that is their choice. When a person is physically abused and they bail that person out so they don't have to be alone, that is their choice. I understand that there are other challenges or obstacles that influence a person's decision and I will touch on that next.

As you can see I believe that every person has the ability to choose their path, but what about a path that involves children. Most people would say that any situation involving a child is difficult and you just can't walk away or can you? There is obviously incredible challenges that come with an abusive relationship especially when children are involved. I don't mean children are being abused but their perception of both parents is that of a loving and nurturing one where they may not understand what goes on behind closed doors. Separating that child from either parent is likely to have a significant emotional effect on that child. The level of emotion though is dependent on their age and their understanding of the situation. Teenagers are more likely to understand what abuse is where a 4 year old looks up to both parents and doesn't have the mindset to understand it. This makes any victim second guess their decisions knowing that removing the child from this situation will have some emotional effect on the child when they are used to having two parents in their lives.

If this were the latter part of the 20th century I would agree that taking a child and walking away from your abuser would be the right decision but this is the 21st century and we have learned many things over the years. Your child no longer can be used as an excuse to stay in a relationship because doing so plays to your character as a parent, especially in the eyes of the State. That statement may seem harsh but it's reality and if a person is likely to abuse you they are likely to move on to child abuse at some point. Most abusers escalate over time especially when you allow them to. You can't use the excuse "They would never hurt their child", because they already abuse a person they claim to love so why would a child be any different in their mind psychologically? Then comes the question, "What about the father's right to see the child?" and to that I say let the courts decide that and focus on protecting your child and yourself from further abuse.

I have beaten this topic to death but I want to make the point that I myself have never experienced abuse in the manner that most have. I am not a parent, well I was one for a short period until paternity results came back, but I have seen and heard enough stories to make myself feel like I been in their shoes psychologically (not physically). We can use every excuse in the book as to why a relationship should never be broken, especially when it involves children, but are you willing to accept all consequences for making the wrong choice, even though you feel its right but everyone tells you otherwise? If you feel endangered around your abuser wouldn't you feel the same for the child? The fact remains you, the victim, have a choice and you have to live with that choice. As long as you allow a person to be abusive they will always be one. Do something now and help yourself, your loved ones and potential future victims otherwise you're giving them a slap on the wrist for their actions.

People are most certainly going to criticize me for talking about something I have never experience myself. This may be true but that doesn't change the fact you have a voice and a choice. Many people have walked away and taken their children with them because it was what was best. Let the legal system take over at that point but you took the first step in removing yourself and your child from the situation which if you think about it is a Choice you have.